Harry Potter Sucks

If you’re going to write a long diatribe to respond to something with the title “Harry Potter Sucks”, stop reading now. You won’t like this. It’ll anger you and you’ll probably miss the point. This is a satirical critique. Even though it has many valid points, the objective is to open a few eyes, not tick people off. If it makes you feel better, rant about my favorite book, Ulysses by James Joyce. Qualifications For the record, I’ve... Read More

Creative Writinger: The Tale of Bettering Your Writing to Be Creatively (A Sequel)

Consider this an addendum to my first piece on this subject. I make no claim to be a brilliant or even proficient writer (too many of the latter lack the quality of being the former) but I do claim to see through gimmickry. Your plot should revolve around a college student drinking at a party. He or she should relate to another student by drinking an obscure brand of beer together. They should talk about rock music and/or your favorite writer, and... Read More

How to Creatively Write (A Joke)

I’m no published author; but if I were published I’d be one: so I think that qualifies me to tell you all what to do when you write a short story. Here are the rules; you’ll note they’re apartheidingly good, as have I’ve worked much harder on them today than I was being the day before. If you’re wondering why the above paragraph was so amazing, then read on. Use at least two semicolons per page. They don’t... Read More